What Your Body Can't Show
by caithzadz
Summary: Sai believes that he never had any emotion. Sakura believes otherwise. ONESHOT


Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto. If I did, then it's SaixSakura all the way. I'm still praying for it.

**What Your Body Can't Show**

For as long as he could remember, Sai had always been a part of Root. In Root, he was taught that emotions were useless during a mission, mere obstacles to completing your task; when one was carried away by emotions, he forgets everything else. In Root, he was trained not to feel; he and his fellow Root members moved and acted like robots; they didn't smile, didn't laugh, and when they got even the slightest bit attached to something, they were severely punished. The last and only time Sai remembered that he felt any emotion at all, prior to meeting Naruto, was with his brother. Though they weren't blood related, whenever Sai was with his brother, he was happy and even smiled, not caring about punishment. Art was a passion they shared and for some years, both managed to hide their attachment to this hobby; to them, it was more than a hobby, it was a way of life. But after his brother died, Sai no longer had a reason to be happy, no longer felt the need to smile; he completely shut himself from feeling. And thus, Sai became the emotionless Root shinobi that Team Kakashi first met.

Sai continued his art and became talented and ruthless in the ninja arts, unable to feel any remorse or mercy to his victims, and catching the eye of Danzo, who used the young teenager in his plans to conquer Konoha. When Sai first joined Team Kakashi, he was a both a replacement and a spy. He didn't care about teamwork or camaraderie; he only cared about completing his mission and returning to his master. However, Sai never expected the outcome of his top-secret mission. He never expected to be drawn into Naruto's strange personality. The idea of bonds began to fascinate the young artist. He never expected to suddenly feel something he could only describe as desire; a desire to learn more about these bonds that Naruto and Sakura often talked about. Sai was curious; he wanted to know why they treasured a bond that did nothing but hurt them.

So Sai decided to educate himself. He went to library as often as he could and read book after book on human emotions. With each information he consumed, he became even more confused and thus, devoured more books, feeling a deep desire to truly understand the people he had come to refer to as friends. He wanted to know how to act better around them, he wanted to understand their behaviors. In addition, he wanted them to acknowledge him. Sai was no fool, he knew that his appearance was similar to that of Sasuke Uchiha, which he later on realized, was a rather painful reminder to his two teammates when they first met him.

After he had decided that he wanted to feel, Sai observed everything around him, the people, other shinobis, his new friends. The one who fascinated him the most was his pink-haired teammate, Sakura Haruno. He had been observing that she often looked at him and watched his every move, not knowing that Sai noticed. He found this rather strange and unusual. After consulting with Naruto, he discovered that Sakura was deeply in love with Sasuke and since he, Sai, was a replica, it was even more painful for her to be around him.

Love. What was love? How come out of all the emotions, love appeared to be the most important to nearly everybody he knew? What was so special about it that people fought for it?

Curious of this emotion, Sai went to the library and consumed book after book on love and relationships. Based on careful analysis, he distinguished Sakura's looks as longing and pain. Which greatly confused him because he read that love was supposed to be a wonderful feeling, a feeling that made you happy. But how come whenever the Uchiha was brought up, Sakura looked like she felt the opposite? Though she smiled, Sai determined them to be her fake ones. He was very, very, very confused.

He finally had the chance to ask her when she visited his apartment. Actually, it was more of her just stopping by to inform him that they had a new mission.

"Shishou wants us to be at the tower in half an hour," she told him. "Kakashi-sensei's getting Naruto."

"Ah, I see," Sai replied. "Let me just get my things." He turned to go back inside when he remembered something he read some weeks before; it was a friendly gesture to invite someone into your home. "Won't you come in, Hag?"

Before he knew it, he was sporting a new bruise on the side of his lip, one of the many she had given him. It was another detail that confused Sai; he read that women liked being called the opposite of the truth. He was doing just that, but why was she always punching him? Ino always smiled whenever he called her "gorgeous."

As he gathered some blank scrolls and new bottles of ink, he could see Sakura turning her head to take in her surroundings. His wall of artwork caught her attention and she strode over to them.

"Wow, Sai," she breathed, an impressed look on her face. "These are beautiful."

"Thank you," he replied, picking up paintbrushes, deciding which ones to take with him.

She continued gazing at his artwork, smiling in delight at some and frowning at others.

After zipping his backpack shut, Sai swung it over his shoulder and turned to the pink-haired kunoichi. "Hag, I'm ready."

Surprisingly, she didn't punch him this time. Instead, she turned to him, a strange look on her face. Sai decided that she looked worried.

"You haven't named any of them yet," she stated. "I thought you were beginning to feel emotions."

"A little bit," Sai admitted. "But when I made those, I didn't have emotions; I felt nothing and thus, those paintings hold nothing."

She flashed him a sad look. Deciding not to dwell on it, Sai turned to leave.

"You're wrong."

The dark-haired artist stopped in his tracks. Curious now, he turned around to look at the pinkette.

She looked at him in, what he discerned as pity. She shook her head. "You're wrong," she repeated.

Sai tilted his head to the side and fake-smiled at her. "On what exactly, may I ask? Do explain."

"They do hold emotions." Sakura turned her head to the painting behind her. It was a simple abstract of shapes with yellow and orange colors with hints of green. This one, I can tell when you painted this, you were calm and content." She moved to another, this one swirls of dark purple and black. "Confusion. Anger. A bit of melancholy I guess."

She now had his full attention. No one had ever tried to understand his work before. And here was Sakura, naming emotion after emotion. He wasn't even sure if she was right, but looking at his work now, like really looking at them, he could see what she was seeing; he was an artist by nature after all. And it appeared that so was this pink-haired teammate of his, though she probably didn't know it.

Sakura turned to him, a smile playing on her lips. "Even though Root taught you not to feel, it's still human nature." She walked up to him. "You may not have known it Sai, but while you were drawing or painting these works, you were feeling something."

He looked past her to his wall again. He just remembered; that second one she pointed out, the purple and black swirls, he painted it after his brother died. Was what Sakura was telling him true? Did he really have feelings all along?

"These are your emotions Sai," she continued, gesturing with her arm at the wall. "You were trained not to feel any emotion. Your emotions never disappeared; you thought you lost them, but in truth, they were hidden deep inside you. So I believe that what your body couldn't show, your art showed."

At that moment, all Sai could do was stand silent as Sakura smiled at him. He wasn't sure how to act with this new revelation. But he knew, deep inside himself, that she was right. She was completely right.

And looking at the pleased look on his teammate's face, the way her smile seemed to brighten the otherwise, gloomy studio, Sai felt something… warm… and fuzzy bubbling inside him. Was this what they called happiness?

For the first time in a while, Sai's lips lifted into a rare, genuine smile. "Yes," he said to the surprised Sakura. "I see it now. But Ugly, I have a question." Before she could hound him on the nickname, he continued. "Do any of my works display the emotion love?"

At his question, her eyes widened in surprise. She looked over his paintings again

"I'm not quite sure. Why?"

He just looked at her. "I'm rather confused. In the books I read, they say love is a wonderful feeling. But how come whenever you talk about Sasuke, you always look hurt and pained? I do not understand. Are my books wrong?"

At this, she turned red and shook her head. "No matter how much you read about emotions, Sai, you won't be able to understand them, unless you feel them. Love especially, is the hardest to comprehend."

Taking this in, he nodded. "I see now. My art shows my emotions. It is easier for me to understand certain emotions that you say, are displayed in my art such as happiness, sadness, and anger. But for an emotion such as love, I do not understand it because I have never felt it."

Sakura shook her head again. "You do understand love, Sai."

Sai scrunched his face in confusion. "I'm not certain I get what you're saying."

She let out a frustrated sigh. "What I mean to say is, you have felt love."

"But you just said you don't see it in my art."

"I don't. But your art is not the only way you show your emotions you know. Based on the way you talk about your brother, I can see that you loved him. You see Sai, love is when you're always happy when you're with someone. But sometimes, love is painful, like what I feel for Sasuke; a one-sided love." She sighed. "It's hard to explain but when you fall in love, I'm sure you'll understand."

Sai was even more confused. "How do I fall in love?"

Sakura giggled in amusement. "Silly, you can't make it happen. Love is something that just… happens. You'll see what I mean when you get there. But the point is, love is something felt towards another person, be it family, friend, or lover. It's when you're happy to be with that person, you never want to see them hurt, and you feel this need to protect them and make sure that they're happy. Do you understand a bit now?"

Sai thought about it and nodded. "Yes, I am beginning to. So then, does this mean that I love you and Naruto?"

Sakura suddenly looked taken aback.

"Ever since we became friends, I always feel happy when I'm around you and I always want to protect you. And it makes me, I believe the emotion is sad, when I see you both sad as well."

At first, Sakura simply looked shocked. But then, she broke into a smile. "Yes, I suppose you love us, alright."

Sai's eyes brightened. "And do you love me as well?"

Suddenly, Sakura's cheeks reddened and she looked away. "Um… You are a good friend Sai. And Naruto and I are happy to be your teammates. Um… I can see you're all packed and ready. So… uh… Let's go."

And quick as lightning, she walked past him and out the door. Although she didn't really answer his question, Sai decided that he was content for now. With a real smile plastered on his face, he followed her out the door.

* * *

Two Years Later…

A knock came on Sakura's apartment door and she opened it to reveal Sai. He had a wide smile on his face and she felt her heart skip a beat; she had begun to love his smile.

"Sai! You're back!" she said, happily as she threw her arms around his neck.

He had a solo Anbu mission and was gone for over two weeks. Sakura thought about him the whole time he was gone. She often found herself worrying about his safety whenever he away on such missions. She knew why, but she just wouldn't admit the truth. Not yet, at least.

"Yes, I am," he replied as she let him go. He began to shift uncomfortably, which Sakura found quite cute. "Um… Would you like to go on a walk with me, Sakura?"

He had stopped calling her "Hag" and "Ugly" over a year ago. Sakura was rather touched the first time he called her by her name; it was a great improvement.

Her smiled widened. "Sure!"

During their walk, Sai narrated the events of his mission and Sakura listened, glad that he was home. She missed him terribly and wondered if he had missed her too.

Sasuke was finally captured a year ago. He was stripped of his shinobi title and had been in prison ever since with the rest of his team. Meanwhile, Sakura discovered that after many years of running after him, trying to catch his attention, loving him without being loved in return, her feelings for him have dissipated into mere friendship; she still loved him but now as a sister loves her brother, and she wanted him to change back. She, Naruto and the rest of the original Rookie nine were doing their best to change him back to the Sasuke they knew, but to no avail.

Though he never had any sort of relationship with the Uchiha, Sai helped as much as he could. Sakura appreciated his efforts and in return, she refrained from punching the living daylights out of him whenever he accidentally insulted her or called her those nicknames; it was difficult to do so at first, but eventually, she learned to stop her fists from jamming themselves into his to jaw. The first time she didn't punch him, he looked rather surprised and confused. She could feel his eyes watching her every move ever since. Oddly, Sakura let him. She also began helping him out a lot more with his emotions and soon enough, Sai had begun to act _almost_ normal.

The two had also gotten closer the past year and a half. With Naruto not wishing to bother them with his grief, Sai was the one who stayed by Sakura's side and comforted her after Sasuke's final rejection. The artist stayed with her, hovering over her with concern and worry etched on his otherwise emotion-less face. Soon enough, Konoha no longer found it odd to see Sakura and Sai out together without Naruto. Sure, the blonde still hung out with them every chance he got, but most of the time, it was just Sai and Sakura. They would spar with each other for hours, eat ramen at Ichiraku's, or just sit somewhere and watch the sunset in silence, a hobby they had become rather fond of. Sometimes, Sai would timidly as if he could draw her, to which she would oblige; her apartment walls were now filled with various portraits that Sai had drawn or painted of her. And all of them had names; "Sakura" was the first painting and it simply showed her with a sakura tucked behind her ear; "Cherry Blossoms Under the Sun" showed Sakura with the sunset behind her; and "Petals" showed Sakura sitting underneath a tree of her namesake with the petals falling around her (this was her favorite).

"We made it to sunset," he said, tilting his head west.

Sakura looked and sure enough, the sun was beginning to go down. Before she could say anything, Sai took her hand and led her to a bench where they had a nice view of the scene. For a while, they just sat there, watching the sunset and enjoying each other's company. Sakura laid her head on Sai's shoulder.

"Sakura-san?"

"Hmm?"

When the artist didn't reply, she raised her head and looked at him. His eyes were on the sunset but Sakura could tell his mind was elsewhere.

"What's wrong?" she asked.

Finally, he looked at her, a look of anxiety on his face. "Do you remember when you told me that what my body couldn't show, my art shows?"

Scrunching her eyebrows together, Sakura nodded. "I remember. That was the day you told me that you love me and Naruto."

He blushed and Sakura giggled; he was just so cute!

Sai coughed before taking his backpack from his shoulder. Without a word, he opened it and took out his sketchbook. He flipped through the pages and finding what he needed, looked back at her.

"Will you tell me what this shows?" he said, handing her the book.

Heart pounding, Sakura took it, curious. It was a sketch, but unlike anything he has drawn before. It was of the two of them; they were underneath a sakura tree, their eyes closed, Sakura leaning on Sai with her head on his shoulder and his head over hers, their hands intertwined, and content smiles on their faces as sakura petals rained down on them. It was beautiful! It knocked the breath out of Sakura as she stared at it.

"Sai… This is…" She looked up at him.

Sai was smiling, pink tints on his cheeks. "What do you think that says?"

"I-It… It shows that… you're happy when you're with me, and I'm happy when I'm with you," she replied, heat rushing to her cheeks.

He nodded. "What else?"

Her blush deepened. "It shows… It shows how much you wish to protect me."

He nodded, more enthusiastically this time. "There's something else."

Her heart pounding, Sakura's lips lifted into a smile as she placed a hand on his cheek. "It shows that you love me."

His smiled widened and he nodded. "You have been a great friend to me, Sakura; my best friend in fact. You alone, understood my art, understood me. You alone could read the emotions behind the works I created when I could not. It was because of you that I began to feel, began to see everything in a different perspective, began to feel with my art. After my brother died and before met you and Naruto, I wasn't sure about what love was; I thought it was stupid emotion, because all it did was hurt everyone who felt it. I didn't understand it. But through you, I was finally able to see that though love hurts, I still want to feel it because it is a wonderful feeling. And whenever you cried because of love, I cried too because I wanted you to love me. Now, I don't want you to cry anymore. I want you to know that you are wrong in believing that you are not worthy to be loved, because here I am, and I love you. I love you Sakura."

Sakura's heart swelled with joy as happy tears slid down her cheeks. Tenderly, Sai wiped them away with his thumb before cupping her cheek. He leaned into her, then hesitated and looked at her, asking permission. Smiling at his need for her approval, she filled the gap. His lips were soft and gentle against hers. As he kissed her, Sakura never wanted him to let her go; she wanted to stay right there, next to him. Because she loved him too. She didn't know when or how it happened, but somewhere along the way, she had fallen in love with Sai.

Gently, he broke the kiss and leaned his forehead against hers. They stayed like that for a while and Sakura savored the feel of his thumb stroking her cheek.

"I love you, Sai," she whispered, smiling.

He smiled back and pulled her into his arms. "I love you too, Sakura."

Their eyes connected and she leaned in to kiss him again. This kiss was more gentle, more passionate. They took their time this time; no rushing. They knew that they had time. They had plenty of time to show each other how much they loved each other.

When they broke apart, wide smiles were etched onto their flushed faces.

"Because of you, my body can now show you what I feel," Sai said, stroking her cheek.

Sakura giggled. "I'm glad. But Sai?"

He kissed her forehead. "Yes?"

She took his sketchbook and looked at the drawing. "Don't stop showing me how you feel through your art, okay?"

He chuckled and nodded. "Of course not. After all, what my body can't show, I can always show in my art."

Sakura nodded before placing her head on his shoulder and snuggling up to him. Sai in turn placed his arm over her shoulders and placed his head over hers. Together, they watched the sun go down for another tomorrow.


End file.
